Thoughts on course-correction, self-care and being human
Not one of these hand-dyed napkins turned out they way I’d anticipated, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are beautiful and useful, and were created with love.
Oh friends,
It seems like every planet might be in refr0mange or some dang thing, because doesn’t it feel like all sorts of things are happening at once! I am, in my own slow-moving little old lady way, on an emotional rollercoaster, with my family life and work life in the microwave along with Jupiter et al.
To help navigate this, I have been immersing myself (a little pun there, ha-ha) in my natural dyeing projects. It’s a lovely, meditative time, and I’ve come to realize that some of things that are causing me so much distress lately are issues where there’s disagreement on how to manage a situation and move on.
Among some people that I deal with, punitive measures seem to hold an unsettling popularity as a method of dealing with things, along with an establishment of fault and the assumption that administration of punishment will sort things out. If it doesn’t, it may just mean the right kind of punishment wasn’t administered. While I can see the appeal of this black-and-white vision, I feel it can be dehumanizing, and seems a little old-fashioned to me.
At the other end, there are my beloved peeps–people who more I can more closely identify with, who have struggled, with physical or mental or cognitive health issues, with poverty, racism, intergenerational trauma, or who are even just interested in these issues because they are sensitive human beings who are aware of the suffering of others. People who have no problem seeing people as individuals, with their own backstory and set of circumstances that has led them to where they are. I know more of these people than I’d initially thought, and I’m so grateful to you all.
In my own life, I try to take responsibility for my actions, including mistakes and their resolution. I know that I am, in spite of my best efforts, only a well-intentioned amateur in many areas. For people like me, mistakes are like a stepladder that help me ascend to new heights of understanding at my own pace.
Mistakes have their place; they are inevitable. We can dread them and burn with shame at every one we make, or we can make them knowing we are doing our best with the tools that we have, and a willingness to learn from experience. I look forward to being reminded of this when we use our napkins.
This week holds a bit of anxiety for me as life plays out some exciting bits…cross your fingers with me, and let’s hope for reasonable, thoughtful outcomes to my best efforts, and the best efforts of those I care for.
